Friday March 20, 2009
By F. Joel Goldstrand - Golf Digest
Symphony Corporation , of Madison Wisconsin, announced today that they signed the Jackal as their lead player rep for the upcoming PanJack Tour Season. Symphony spokesman Abu Vishnu told reporters "We are thrilled to have the Jackal in our family and look forward to the exposure he will give to our new product lines this coming season."
Upon hearing the news the press descended upon the Jackal's off-season residence, the Ebenezer Home. I had an opportunity to speak to the Head Nurse, of the Cantankerous Ward, Betty Wipass. Betty said that the Jackal's sponsorship with the adult diaper manufacturer, Catchaload, had expired in December and the Jackal was contemplating playing the tour this year without a sponsor until Symphony approached with an intriguing offer.
The specific details of the Jackal's deal will not be made public but Betty said that the guaranteed monies are fair and that the incentives for tournament wins and total money won, are extensive. In addition the Jackal will have the opportunity to spend more time with his son who serves and protects the citizenry of Madison.
The Jackal's wife, the Jackalette, was thrilled upon hearing the news of the sponsorship and Chardonnay futures in California rose by 25 points on the commodities exchange.
The Jackal was not available for comment as Nurse Wipass informed us that the Jackal was secluded in training for an upcoming cage match with Verne Gagne.
2 comments:
I am thrilled to hear about the Jackal gaining a new sponsor. It is always great when the WWII vets can get out of the home for some R&R. I have tried to get the Jackal to sign with the leader in adult diapers "Opps I crapped my pants" but he never wanted to get involved. He had a big problem with being a product tester.
Way to go Jackal! I look forward to punishing you in this new NON-Fox season.
The Great Panda
Bring it on Mr. Yippsie Doodle!!
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